Going to a Family Court Hearing

This guide is for people who are going to family court hearings for things like:

• Divorce, 
• Child support, 
• Allocation of Parental Responsibilities (custody) 
• Dependency and Neglect cases 

How should I get ready for my court hearing?

It is important to be organized before going to court. Getting your paperwork ready now will lower your stress when you go to court. Start gathering your documents as early as you can. Bring all documents you think you may need. 

Be sure to bring 4 copies of every document. You need:

• 1 copy for the judge, 
• 1 copy for the other person in the case, 
• 1 copy for the witness, and 
• 1 copy for yourself.

Put your documents together in one spot 

• Loose papers can make you feel stressed. Put your documents into a binder or a folder to stay organized.

Label each section of your documents 

• Use paper clips or staples to keep related papers together. Sticky notes or tabs work great to mark what each paper is so you can find it quickly.

What can I plan ahead?

1. Map out your travel
   • Check the court location, figure out parking, and plan to arrive at least 30 minutes early to go through security and find your courtroom.
   • If you are worried about your safety walking from your car to the courthouse, you may want to bring a friend or other support person with you. You can also ask a sheriff’s deputy to walk you back to your car after your hearing.  
2. Dress as neatly as you are able 
   • Wear neat, clean clothing to show respect for the court process.
3. Know what to say 
   • Write down the main points you want to make on a notepad so you do not freeze or forget details when speaking to the judge.
      

What rules do I need to follow when I’m in court?

Every courthouse has rules that people have to follow. Here are some common rules that you may experience at court:  

Security 

• You have to go through a security check at a courthouse. This usually means walking through a metal detector or being checked by a sheriff’s deputy with a wand.
• You will likely have to take off your belt, take off jewelry, and empty your pockets. 
• Any bags you have will be searched and/or go through an X-ray machine.
• No weapons of any kind are allowed in the courthouse. 
  • It is important that you remove any pocket knives, nail files/clippers, mace, anything sharp, and/or self-defense key chains from your bag or keys before entering the courthouse. Security will either take these items or make you take them back to your car.  

How court works

• People to know in the courtroom
  • Judge
    • The judge oversees the hearing from a raised seat called a bench. The judge makes sure courtroom rules are followed, asks questions, and makes the final legal decisions. They will likely be dressed in a black robe.
  • Court or Judicial Clerk
    • This person manages court paperwork and plans the court’s schedule. They may ask you to introduce yourself or check in. 
• How to know the court session has begun
  • The court clerk or judge will say “All rise.” Every person, including yourself, is expected to stand up as the judge enters the courtroom. 
    • If you are physically unable to stand, let the court staff know before court has begun. 
  • The judge will let you know when it is time to sit. The judge will also call out the schedule of cases set for hearings that day. 
• When your hearing is called, stand up and: 
  • Say your name
  • Say whether you are the petitioner (if you are the person who filed the case), the respondent (if you are the other person) or another party (such as a witness). 
  • Sit down at the “counsel table.” 
    • Be sure to take all of your belongings with you. If you don’t know where to go, ask the court staff.

How to act 

Most courts expect people to act or behave in a certain way. Some examples are:

• Most courtrooms do not allow food, gum, or drinks in the courtroom. 
  • Water is often allowed, and the counsel table will often have a pitcher with water and cups available for you.  
• Cell phone: Make sure to turn off or silence any cell phones or other electronic devices you may have. 
• You may not take photos, record (audio or video), or stream any portion of a court hearing including during any breaks. Do not post on social media what is going on in the courtroom. 
  • The court has a recording system to make sure it makes a clear audio record of the hearing. If you need a copy, you may request one from the court clerks later.  You may be charged for it.  
• There may be other cases before yours is called. It is important that you sit quietly during these other hearings. Do not use your phone or talk with people around you, and do not leave the courtroom until your case is called. 
• Do not bring your children to court unless you have been ordered by the judge to do so.  

How do I present myself well?

How to talk to the judge

• Address the judge by either saying “Judge ___ [last name of judge]” or “Your Honor.” 
• Do not interrupt the judge, the other party, or their attorney. Each person will have a turn to speak, and the judge will tell you when it is time for you to speak. Do not speak when it is not your turn.
• Do not argue with the judge after the judge has made a decision. The judge had an opportunity to hear your side and the other person's side.
• When answering questions, you need to clearly say “yes” or “no.” Do not just nod/shake or use informal words like “yep.” If you do not understand a question, you can say “I do not understand.”

Remember

• Be polite, professional, and respectful to everyone.
• Do not yell. Speak clearly, calmly, and slowly. 
• Address the judge, rather than the other side or their attorney.  

Before you leave

• Make sure to get your questions answered. If you don’t understand any ruling, verdict, or order, be sure to ask the judge before you leave.

What if my hearing is remote? 

Remember, a remote hearing is still court. Think about your virtual meeting room just like you would think about an actual courtroom. Do the same amount of preparation and follow the same rules in this guide. 

General virtual meeting tips: 

• Test your setup in enough time before your online hearing so you can fix anything before it starts and not delay the hearing. 
• Dress fully (you might have to stand up). 
• Check the lighting. 
• Consider your background and make sure it’s professional and not distracting. 
• Try to be in a quiet location where you can hear the audio.  
• Do not allow your children to be in the room where you are attending your hearing.  

Need more help?

You can get help from the courts. Every judicial district has staff called “Sherlocks” to help people with their legal questions. To find the Sherlock in your county, visit the Judicial Department’s Sherlock webpage.